


I walk through your dreams and invent the future

by CydSA



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: After that anything goes, Captain America: The Winter Soldier Compliant, I have Avengers:Endgame issues, Iron Man 3 Compliant, M/M, Sort of Captain America: Civil War Compliant, Until it isn't
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-14
Updated: 2019-07-04
Packaged: 2020-03-05 13:30:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 10,976
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18829624
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CydSA/pseuds/CydSA
Summary: Tony watches Steve destroy SHIELD. Steve watches the Mandarin destroy Tony's home. They both lie to each other. A lot.And then Ultron happens and Zemo and Thanos and somehow they have to learn to trust each other again.With the fate of the universe at stake, will they?





	1. waiting for you to find me

**Author's Note:**

> So this was born in part a response to my endless tears from Endgame as well as an all time fave fic Iron Man: Director of S.W.O.R.D. by Pookaseraph https://archiveofourown.org/works/1552202 which I have read too many times to remember.
> 
> A million thanks to the most excellent resource :https://transcripts.fandom.com/wiki/ - I've used a fair bit of script right from the movies so they are my go-to. All errors are my own.
> 
> I have an idea where I'm going. I hope you stick with me for the ride.

**waiting for you to find me**

Tony watched as the Helicarriers fired at each other and crashed into the Potomac. He waited to see Steve, held his breath as Project Insight imploded on itself.

“Sir,” JARVIS sounded concerned. “There is a great deal of information that has been uploaded onto the World Wide Web.”

Tony couldn’t take his gaze from the television screen. Where was Cap? “Hmm?” he murmured.

“Encrypted information from the files of SHIELD are available for anyone to see.”

Tony blinked. “What? That’s not possible.”

“The release signature has an embedded code that I have confirmed as Agent Romanoff’s,” JARVIS said.

“Get it all,” Tony ordered, swinging away from the TV and rolling his chair to his console. “Find it, get it, and destroy any trace of it.”

“I’ve already begun that, sir.” JARVIS sounded a little offended. 

“Sorry, J, I shouldn’t have even asked.” Tony watched as thousands of terabytes of data began scrolling across his screens. “This is not good,” he muttered. “This is _very_ not good.”

Bruce wandered in. “What’s up?”

Tony waved a hand at the monitors. “It looks like our friends in Washington decided to decrypt every file SHIELD ever had, and then toss it out for the world to see.”

“ _Everything_?” Bruce asked.

Tony shrugged. “It looks like it. I won’t know until J has had a chance to analyze it.”

Bruce looked over at the television. “What has Steve done?” he whispered.

“Thrown every SHIELD agent to the wolves,” Tony scowled. “Blown all their covers, left them to fend for themselves in a world that wants to kill them.”

“He wouldn’t do something like this without a good reason,” Bruce said. “Steve’s not exactly the impulsive sort.”

“Sir, if I may?” JARVIS interjected.

“Go ahead, J.”

“I’ve only begun to sort the data, but it appears as though SHIELD has been infiltrated almost completely by HYDRA.”

“What?” Tony jumped to his feet. “Show me,” he demanded.

“Part of the upload was a video file, also with Agent Romanoff’s signature,” JARVIS said. “I’ve sent it to monitor three.”

Tony and Bruce watched as WSC Secretary Alexander Pierce asked WSC Councilman Singh, “Let me ask you a question. What if Pakistan marched into Mumbai tomorrow, and you knew that they were gonna drag your daughters into a soccer stadium for execution? And you could just stop it with a flick of the switch. Wouldn't you? Wouldn't you all?”  


Singh replied, “Not if it was your switch.” They both flinched as one of the SHIELD agents handed Pierce a gun. Pierce pointed it at Singh and Tony sucked in a breath. Suddenly Councilwoman Hawley kicked Singh out of the way, taking down the other SHIELD agents in the room before disarming and pointing the gun at Pierce  


Tony started laughing as she then scrubbed at her face and Natasha drawled, “I'm sorry. Did I step on your moment?” Pierce went white with rage.

She kept the gun on him as she walked over to a computer console. “What are you doing?” Councilman Rockwell demanded.

“She's disabling security protocols and dumping all the secrets onto the Internet,” Pierce said.

Natasha’s cool gaze met his hot one. “Including HYDRA's.”

“Fuck!” Tony exclaimed as he paused the video. “JARVIS, are you taking notes here?”

“I’m attempting to separate SHIELD from HYDRA, sir, but it is very difficult. It’s a like a tumor on a brain stem.”

“Do you need more processing power?” Tony asked.

“Accessing more as we speak, sir,” JARVIS assured him. “The video clip has some more information that I believe you find interesting.”

Tony turned back to hear Pierce say, “And SHIELD's. If you do this, none of your past is going to remain hidden.” Natasha ignored him, continuing with whatever she was doing. “Are you sure you're ready for the world to see you as you really are?” The anger had turned into a kind of oily menace that reminded Tony of Obie. He shuddered.

Natasha crooked her mouth, raising an eyebrow as she asked, “Are you?”

Pierce watched her, shark-like and ready to take his chance. “Disabling the encryption is an executive order, it takes two Alpha Level members.” He smiled. Tony wanted to put his fist through the screen. This asshole had assassinated Nick Fury and was just gloating about it now.  


Natasha just smiled, that annoyingly knowing smile that Tony knew all too well. The one that said that she knew something that nobody else did. “Don't worry, company's coming.”

Tony stilled. “What?” He looked at Bruce. “The only other Alpha Level was…” The sound of a helicopter drew his attention back to the monitor. “That fucking son of a fucking bitch,” he hissed as he watched Fury step out, coat swirling around his legs. His arm was strapped up, but he looked none the worse for wear.

Pierce bit his lip, nodding slowly to himself. Tony was pretty impressed with how directly he looked at Fury as he asked, “Did you get my flowers?” Fury’s expression could have melted the center of the sun. “I'm glad you're here, Nick,” Pierce continued.

“Really?” Tony had never been so happy to hear that sarcastic tone. “’Cause I thought you had me killed.”

Pierce didn’t move as Fury stalked towards him. “You know how the game works.”

“So why make me head of SHIELD?” Fury seemed genuinely curious.

Pierce’s smile was a little rueful. “Because you were the best and the most ruthless person I ever met.” Tony admired the guy’s cajones. He really wasn’t afraid of Fury like the rest of humanity.

“I did what I did to protect people,” Fury snarled.

Pierce shook his head a little. “Our enemies are your enemies, Nick. Disorder, war. It's just a matter of time before a dirty bomb goes off in Moscow, or an EMP fries Chicago. Diplomacy? Holding action, a Band-Aid. And you know where I learned that; Bogota. You didn't ask, you just did what had to be done. I can bring order to the lives of seven billion people by sacrificing twenty million. It's the next step, Nick, if you have the courage to take it.”

Fury seemed disgusted. “No, I have the courage _not_ to.” He took Pierce over to the retinal scanner, Natasha’s hand steady on her gun.

“You don't you think we wiped your clearance from the system?” Pierce sneered.

Fury’s mouth curved the tiniest bit and Tony just _knew_ that the asshole had a back-up plan. “I know you erased my password, probably deleted my retinal scan, but if you want to stay ahead of me, Mr. Secretary,” he lifted his eyepatch revealing that scarred eye, “You need to keep _both_ eyes open.” He guided Pierce to the scanner and it cleared with the scan of Fury’s dead eye.

Natasha looked down at her phone. “Done,” she said, smirking. “And it’s trending.” Tony watched in horror as the council members suddenly collapsed, smoke billowing from their chests. Pierce held up a remote as Fury and Natasha turned their guns back on him.

Pierce looked at Natasha, “Unless you want two inch hole in your sternum, I'd put that gun down.” She didn’t. Of course she didn’t, Tony seethed. “That was armed the moment you pinned it on,” Pierce told her. They both lowered their weapons, and the video cut out.

“Oh my god,” Bruce breathed. Tony shot a sharp glance at him. “He’s going to kill them.”

“Just keep it together, buddy,” Tony said, “Cap and his buddies have stopped whatever Pierce was planning to do. I’ve got JARVIS scanning all frequencies to find our errant Avengers.”

“Agent Romanoff and Director Fury are safely aboard a helicopter along with a former Airman named Sam Wilson,” JARVIS told them. “He has been working with the Captain and Agent Romanoff to destroy the Helicarriers and root out HYDRA.”

“Does he know where Cap is?” Tony asked, eyes still taking in the thousands of lines of top secret information just spewing out onto the world. He was going to do his very best to catch it all.

“According to Mr. Wilson, the Captain was last seen on Helicarrier Charlie, attempting to replace the chip that replaced the targeting system. There seems to have been another individual sent by HYDRA to stop the Captain’s mission.”

“Who?” Tony demanded. He deployed several of the Iron Legion to head for Washington. They would scan the river until Steve was found.

“Mr. Wilson would not say, sir.” JARVIS sounded annoyed. “I’m running facial recognition of the security surveillance around SHIELD before the attack.”

“Good thinking, J,” Tony’s smile was a hard, forced thing. “And keep looking for the Captain.”

“Of course, sir,” JARVIS replied.

Bruce was also looking at the SHIELD upload. “This is bad, Tony. Everything that SHIELD has done for the past fifty or more years has been compromised. Everything they’ve accomplished will have to go under scrutiny.”

Tony rubbed at his eyes. “Disaster doesn’t cover it, Bruce. It’s catastrophic for the intelligence community.” He stopped. “Barton.”

“I’ve attempted to contact Agent Barton, sir. I have not yet managed to get a response.”

Tony glared at the television screen again. “Romanoff will know,” he said. “J, tell the dead guy and his merry band that they can use the helipad here at Stark Tower if they have the fuel to get here.”

“I have relayed the message, sir,” JARVIS said. “Director Fury said that it’s about motherfucking time you stepped up.”

Bruce snorted a laugh at hearing JARVIS swearing. “He doesn’t change,” he noted. 

“If he did, the world would end,” Tony agreed. He started a search for Barton, trying to determine his location.

“Sir, I believe that the Captain has been located,” JARVIS said. One of the monitors changed and Tony spotted the motionless body on the edge of the river.

“Get medical personnel there stat,” he snapped. “And where is the goddamn shield?”

“I’m scanning the riverbed for traces of vibranium, sir. The Iron Legion have arrived.” 

“Tell me about Cap’s condition,” Tony ordered. 

One of the remote soldiers bent over Steve’s body. “It appears as though several bones are broken and his vital organs have sustained severe damage.”

“Can he be moved?”

“Perhaps not advisable, sir, but with the Captain’s advanced healing time, it would be better to move him quickly to a medical facility.” JARVIS commanded two of the bots to form a stretched with their arms. “Where should I take him?”

Tony opened his mouth to say SHIELD, but then remembered that SHIELD no longer existed. “Bring him here,” he said, his voice a little hoarse. “Quickly.”

“I’ve found Barton,” Bruce said. “He’s out in rural Missouri.” 

“What the hell is he doing there?” Tony demanded. “J, send one of the…”

“Done, sir.” JARVIS paused. 

“What now?” Tony asked.

“I’ve managed to get a visual on the individual who was attacking the Captain on Helicarrier Charlie, but I’m not entirely sure my systems are working correctly.”

“I designed your systems, J, of course they’re working correctly.” Tony waved a hand. “What’s the problem?”

“Well, the person identified has been reported as killed in action.” JARVIS paused again. “In 1944.”

Tony and Bruce exchanged a glance. “Who is it?” Tony’s throat closed. Somewhere deep inside him, he knew the answer already.

“It’s Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes, sir,” JARVIS said as he enlarged the grainy image. Tony had no problem identifying the guy that he’d idolized most of his life. Forget Captain America, he was a super soldier. Bucky Barnes was just a normal guy who helped save the world.

“That’s impossible,” Bruce said.

“So is Cap,” Tony reminded him. “Can you locate him, J?”

“I am attempting to do so, sir, but he is clearly an expert in tracking and disappearing.”

“Do your best, buddy,” Tony said.

He fell into his chair. “So Bucky Barnes is alive,” he mused. “No wonder Cap went off the reservation.”

“From what I can see on the SHIELD server information, he is an assassin known as the Winter Soldier,” Bruce said. “Credited for thousands of kills over a period of thirty years. He’s become more myth than man.”

Tony looked at the shiny silver arm of the guy dragging Steve out of the river. “He’s real,” he murmured. “And he killed my parents.”

Bruce gaped at him. “What?” He blinked. “How? What?”

“I found out when I hacked the Helicarrier the first time we were all brought together,” Tony admitted. “Found out a little more than the Tesseract being used to create weapons to kill aliens.” 

“Tony, god, I’m so sorry,” Bruce said.

He held up a hand. “I came to terms with that a couple of years ago. I just didn’t know that it was Cap’s boyfriend.”

He watched the feed from the Iron Legion carrying Steve back to New York. “I wonder if he’ll tell me…us.”

“You never said anything,” Bruce pointed out.

“I didn’t know who he was,” Tony reminded him. “I guess we’re going to find out who Cap’s loyal to.”

“Don’t make him choose, Tony.” Bruce took his glasses off. “That’s a very bad idea.”

Tony shrugged. “I’m not known for making the best plans.” Bruce just sighed and continued mining the information from SHIELD. 

Tony folded his arms and leaned back in his chair. He and Cap were friendly. Not friends, not yet, but they managed to run the Avengers Initiative together with very few disagreements. He was sure Cap would tell him that he’d found his childhood sweetheart and that he’d turned out to be the most lethal assassin in the history of the world.

He knew Cap would tell him about Bucky.

~~~~

Cap never said a word.


	2. the things we invent when we are scared and want to be rescued

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jumping back a little in time for Steve to have a revelation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, using much of the script I'm trying to add my Steve/Tony thoughts and motivations for much of what they do. There's a whole lot of baggage with this one
> 
> Thanks for the comments and kudos. I hope you enjoy.

**the things we invent when we are scared and want to be rescued**

Before. 

Before the lies. Before the end. Before the Civil War.

Before.

Steve and Clint dodged and weaved as they danced around the training ring. Clint was already breathless, but Steve hadn’t broken a sweat.

“How come nobody else knows what a complete asshole you are?” Clint gasped as Steve stepped nimbly out of the way of his punch.

“Just ‘cause I wear the stars and stripes doesn’t make me perfect,” Steve grinned as he swept his leg, dropping Clint to the mat like a stone. “You done?”

“I hate you,” Clint groaned, letting Steve pull him back to his feet. “I hurt in muscles where I know for a medical fact there are no muscles.” 

They were just about to begin another round when Steve spotted Natasha. She lifted a hand. “Cap.”

He jumped out of the ring, ignoring Clint’s mutter of, “show-off,” as he headed towards her. “Tasha, what’s up?”

“We have a bit of a situation,” she said. He waited. “With Tony.”

Steve groaned. “God, can’t he just be normal for a while?” Natasha’s little smirk was enough of a reply. “What’s he done now?” The Avengers Tower was home. Had been for a while now. Steve loved the discoveries he made almost every day.

She held up a tablet and pressed play on a video. Tony was standing in front of a hospital, swarmed by reporters. 

One yelled out, “Mr. Stark! Mr. Stark! Our sources are telling us that this is another Mandarin attack. Anything else you can tell us?”

Tony ignored him, moving quickly towards his car. Another reporter shouted, “Hey, Mr. Stark! When is somebody gonna kill this guy? Just sayin'.”

“Who are they talking about?” Steve asked Natasha.

“You been living under a bus, Rogers?” Clint asked, towel swung around his neck as he approached. “The Mandarin is some lunatic who’s bombed a bunch of places. He’s seriously crazy.”

“Oh,” Steve flushed. “I’ve been sorta busy with other things,” he said.

“Those other things can wait,” Natasha said. “This can’t.” She pressed play again.

Tony took his glasses off and stared directly into the camera. “Is that what you want? Here's a little Holiday greeting I've been wanting to send to the Mandarin. I just didn't know how to phrase it until now. My name is Tony Stark and I'm not afraid of you. I know you're a coward, so I've decided that you just died, pal. I'm gonna come get the body. There's no politics here; it's just good old-fashioned revenge. There's no Pentagon; it's just you and me. And on the off-chance you're a man, here's my home address: 10880, Malibu Port, 90265. I'll leave the door unlocked.” He looked at the reporter. “Bill me.” 

He got into his car and sped off, ignoring the shouts of the reporters that he left behind.

“Did he just…?” Clint asked.

Natasha nodded. “He did. Wait. It gets worse.”

“That’s not poss….” Steve’s voice trailed off as he watched in horror as a bomb or a missile hit Tony’s Malibu home, and the side of the cliff just started collapsing. “We need to get there!” He felt sick to his stomach, praying that Tony hadn’t been there. He spotted the suit and felt a moment of relief until he saw that it was Pepper wearing it and she was helping a woman he didn’t recognize out of the house.

“Fuck,” Clint breathed.

And finally, there it was, that beautiful, glorious, over the top flash of red and gold in the sky, and suddenly Steve could breathe again. “It’s Tony, he’s okay.” One of the helicopters took a direct hit from Iron Man and Steve wanted to cheer. Tony managed to take out a second helicopter but then the entire house fell off the cliff, taking Tony with it and plunging into the sea. 

“Oh my god,” Steve felt his heart stop when the screen went black. “Where is he? Is he okay?”

After.

After the fall. After the lie. After the hunt.

After.

It wasn’t until much later, when Steve re-watched the recording of dozens of versions of the Iron Man armor exploding in the most spectacular fireworks show, that he realized the fear he’d felt at the thought of Tony being gone was more than the fear of losing a friend.

It was more. Much more. And Steve had been lying to Tony for months now. By omission yes, but still lying. He wondered if he’d ever get the chance to talk to Tony about Bucky and his parents without it descending into a fight that he had no chance of winning.

Tony walked into the living room, jacket off, tie loose and hands in his pockets. “Whatcha watching, Mon Capitan?” he asked, that sly grin telling Steve that he already knew.

“You were out of it,” Steve reminded him, pointing to the screen. “Why did you come back?”

“You needed me,” Tony replied, quick as lightning. “I’m your lobster.”

Steve frowned. “That makes no sense, Tony.” He made a mental note to look that up later. These casual references kept slipping right over his head and it made him crazy.

Tony grinned. “It does to me.” He took a hand from his pocket and waved at the air. A hologram formed of what appeared to be the layout of a castle.

“What’s that?” Steve asked. Natasha, Clint, Bruce and Thor came into the room just then.

“Assemble!” Tony called, making jazz hands. Natasha’s gaze could have skewered him on the spot. He took a step towards Steve. “Don’t let her torture me before she kills me,” he begged.

Steve hid a laugh behind his hand at Tony’s antics. He’d long come to realize that the snark and quips were all part of the Iron Man armor. In reality, Tony was a very fragile thing. Steve wanted to cherish him forever.

“Tony, what’s the deal?” Steve asked, nodding towards the hologram.

“Oh.” Tony blinked. “The Brucester and I were just doing our genius thing, you know, when all of a sardine a ping went off on the gamma signature trace we’ve had in place since Loki and his goons tried to take over the world.”

Bruce looked pained at the nickname. “It looks similar to the signature of the Tesseract, but there are subtle differences.”

“The scepter?” Natasha asked. Clint went a little pale. Steve made another mental note to check in with him soon.

“Could be,” Tony mused, his gaze on the hologram. “But, I’m thinking it’s worth a look.”

“I believe it is my brother’s scepter,” Thor rumbled. “It too needs to be found and returned to Asgard.”

“Where is this place?” Steve asked.

“A lovely little country in Eastern Europe called Sokovia,” Tony told him. “I’m told tourism there is booming.”

Steve shook his head. “If it’s the scepter then we need to get it back.” He poked a finger at the hologram. It made a sort of squeak and squished up against his finger. He glared at a grinning Tony. “You’re so…”

“Charming? Handsome? Amazingly intelligent?” Tony suggested with a little leer and a tilt of his head.

“Annoying,” Steve finished. He ignored the blatantly fake pout. “When do we leave?”


	3. without a within, song without throat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ultron loses. The cost? Too high. But as the old man said....they do it together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter because we all know that this is the lead-up to the disaster that is Civil War and that is going to take a little more time.
> 
> Hope you enjoy.

**without a within, song without throat**

Tony winced as Steve shouted in his earpiece. “I asked for a solution, not an escape plan!”

Steve’s idealism was a wonderful thing, but sometimes he was just a plain stubborn son of a bitch who didn’t see the big picture. “Impact radius is getting bigger every second.” He clenched his jaw. “We're going to have to make a choice.”

He heard the calm, thankfully sane voice of one Black Widow say, “Cap, these people are going nowhere. If Stark finds a way to blow this rock...”

So of course Captain Stubbornass dug in. “Not 'til everyone's safe.”

Still trying to be voice of reason, Natasha said, “Everyone up here versus everyone down there? There's no math there.” And she was right. Even though the thought of what he was going to have to do made Tony want to throw up.

“I'm not leaving this rock with one civilian on it.” Steven Grant Rogers was an asshole who…

“I didn't say we should leave.” Natasha said, her voice soft with something that made Tony’s throat close. “There's worse ways to go. Where else am I gonna get a view like this?”

And then the gates of heaven opened and God’s voice, who sounded an awful lot like Nick Fury, said, “Glad you like the view, Romanoff. It's about to get better.” There was a pause and Tony heard the beautiful sound of a Helicarrier. He would have to buy something pretty for Fury. Maybe a to-scale size model of himself. “Nice, right? I pulled her out of mothballs with a couple of old friends. She's dusty, but she'll do.”

Steve breathed an almost helpless laugh. “Fury, you son of a bitch.”

Tony wobbled when Fury retorted, “Oh! You kiss your mother with that mouth?” Tony cackled like a crazy person and, then refocused on the task at hand.

From then it was fighting and shouting and shooting until eventually Ultron was punched off the flying chunk of humanity that had been sliced out of the earth. Tony’s mind worked feverishly. This was bad. This was very bad in every way.

It struck him suddenly. “I got it! Create a heat seal. I can...I can supercharge the spire from below.”

FRIDAY responded a moment later. “Running numbers. A heat seal could work with enough power.” 

Yes! Tony thought as he blasted a few more of Ultron’s creations. “Thor, I’ve got a plan!”

Thor shouted through the earpiece, making Tony wince. “We're out of time. They're coming for the core.”

That was not going to happen. Tony wasn’t about to let his fuck-up take any more lives. “Rhodey, get the rest of the people on board that carrier.”

Bless Rhodey for his lack of questions. He just grunted, “On it.”

Tony took a deep breath. “Avengers, time to work for a living.”

FRIDAY interrupted him. “Boss, power levels are way below opt...”

He ignored her as he ordered, “Re-route everything. We get one shot at this. Thor, I'm gonna need you back in the church.”

He heard Thor ask, “Is this the last of them.”

Steve’s reply evidenced his exhaustion. “Yeah. Everyone else is on the carrier.” The city shook and then started dropping. Someone had activated the core. Tony flew beneath the plummeting weapon of mass destruction, and looked up into the blazing core.

“You know, if this works, we maybe don't walk away.” He wondered how many times he was going to be able to stand up. To walk away. To win.

“Maybe not,” Thor’s shrug was audible. Tony moved into position and opened the arc reactor.

“On my mark,” Tony said as the inside of Ultron’s flying bomb lit up. “Now!” he yelled as he blasted the core with everything he had, and the world went white with lightning.

It was as though a mountain was falling down on him. Tony just allowed FRIDAY to pilot the suit, her reactions faster and safer than his right now. It rained brick and mortar and hunks of land that hadn’t seen daylight in centuries. As he bobbed and weaved he realized that this was it. He was done this time. For good.

FRIDAY saved his life. Upgrades were in her future.

Later, back at the new Avengers facility, he and Steve watched Thor leave in that incandescent column of light.

Tony stared at the burn marks left in the grass. “That man has no regard for lawn maintenance.” Steve gave one of those little grins that Tony had grown to cherish. “I'm gonna miss him though. And you're gonna miss me. There's gonna be a lot of manful tears.” They walked together to Tony’s car.

“I _will_ miss you, Tony.” Steve agreed, and didn’t that make his heart give a stupid little giddy leap?

“Yeah? Well, it's time for me to tap out. Maybe I should take a page out of Barton's book and build Pepper a farm, hope nobody blows it up.” Nevermind that Pepper and he were on a very long break. Indefinitely. A farm sounded like fun. Cows and sheep and chicken. He’d hire people to clean up the shit. Tony knew he was babbling, even in his own head. It happened a lot around Steve.

“The simple life?” Steve looked skeptical.

Tony met his gaze. “You'll get there one day.” If anyone deserved a happy ending then Steve Rogers should be in the front of the line.

Steve shrugged, gave a small shake of his head. “I don't know, family, stability? The guy who wanted all that went in the ice seventy-five years ago. I think someone else came out.”

There was something in his voice that made Tony look closer. Those beautiful blue eyes were clouded with something he couldn’t put a finger on. “You alright?” he asked.

Steve sucked in a breath and looked around. “I’m home.”

It was years later that Tony remembered this conversation. Perhaps if he’d paid more attention things would have turned out a little differently.


	4. I ruined everything by saying it out loud

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Civil War. Steve chooses Bucky. Tony lets him go. Liar.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is where I go off canon. Up until the final battle of Civil War most is the same. But, because Tony knows about the Winter Soldier, different choices are made.
> 
> And what comes after? Well, that's up in the air.

**I ruined everything by saying it out loud**

Tony wanted to hit something. Preferably Steve Fucking Rogers. Secretary Ross ranting at him over the phone was his least favorite way to spend his time. He finally interrupted the tirade. “Consequences? You bet there'll be consequences. Obviously you can quote me on that because I just said it. Anything else?” He didn’t wait for a reply before saying, “Thank you, sir,” and ending the call.

Steve looked at him. “Consequences?” Like he didn’t know what kind of fucking hell he’d dropped Tony and the Avengers into. The Accords, Barnes and T’Challa, and everything felt overwhelming.

Tony sucked in a breath, trying to keep calm. “Secretary Ross wants you both prosecuted. Had to give him something.” They all watched as Captain America’s shield and Wilson’s wings were carted away.

“I'm not getting that shield back, am I?” Tony could literally hear his back teeth grinding.

Natasha gave a rueful shrug, “Technically, it's the government's property. Wings, too.”

“That’s cold,” Sam complained.

Tony was just _done_. “Warmer than jail,” he snapped. He stalked out, ignoring the weighted silence left behind. Steve still hadn’t told him about his parents and his _Bucky_.

~~~~

A little while later, after an incredibly awkward discussion about Pepper, as well as the usual Howard comparison, Tony said, “Oh, really? You two knew each other? He never mentioned that. Maybe only a thousand times. God, I hated you.”

Steve barely flinched at Tony’s lashing words. “I don't mean to make things difficult.”

Liar, Tony thought. “I know, because you're a very polite person,” he sneered.

“If I see a situation pointed south… I can't ignore it. Sometimes I wish I could.” He didn’t even look vaguely apologetic.

Liar, Tony thought again. “No, you don’t.”

This time there was a thin smile. “No, I don't. Sometimes…”

“Sometimes I want to punch you in your perfect teeth,” Tony snarled. He reined his rage in. “But I don't want to see you gone. We need you, Cap. So far, nothing's happened that can't be undone, if you sign. We can make the last 24 hours legit. Barnes gets transferred to an American psych-center… instead of a Wakandan prison.” He hated that he sounded like he was begging.

For just one moment he held his breath as Steve picked up one of the pens before turning to Tony. “I'm not saying it's impossible, but there would have to be safeguards.”

It sounded like hope, Tony thought, a tiny sliver of hope but a sliver was better than nothing. “Sure,” he agreed, almost over-eagerly. “Once we put out the PR fire, those documents can be amended. I'd file a motion to have you and Wanda reinstated…”

“Wanda? What about Wanda?” Steve ignored the rest of the sentence, and focused on the girl who had almost broken Tony’s mind.

“She's fine,” Tony assured him. “She's confined to the compound, currently. Vision's keeping her company.” He wasn’t going to let Steve get to him on this. He’d done the right thing, dammit.

Steve stared at him like he had two heads. “Oh God, Tony! Every time. Every time I think you see things the right way…”

“What? It's a 100 acres with a lap pool. It's got a screening room. There's worse ways to protect people.” He could hear the defensiveness and fucking hell, he wasn’t the one in the wrong here. He _wasn’t_.

“Protection?” Steve spat the word. “Is that how you see this? This is protection? It's internment, Tony.”

Tony held on to his control. “She's not a US citizen.”

“Oh, come on, Tony,” Steve scoffed, blue eyes judging him and finding him clearly wanting.

Just like that, Tony had enough. “And they don't grant visas to weapons of mass destruction!” He let Steve see the rage in his own eyes.

They were practically shouting in each other’s faces now. “She’s a kid!”

“Give me a break!” Tony yelled. “I'm doing what has to be done… to stave off something worse!”

Steve nodded. “You keep telling yourself that.” He put the pen down. “I’d hate to break up the set.” That sarcastic, dismissive sentence shredded the last of Tony’s compassion.

Tony watched him leave, putting his friend above everything. Above the Avengers, above the rule of law, above reason.

Above _him_.

~~~~

Tony knew he was taking a chance coming here on his own. Everything had gone to shit, and he had probably already been declared a criminal. He landed in Siberia, grateful for the insulation of the armor. 

“They’re here, boss,” FRIDAY told him. “Behind the doors to your left.”

He took a breath and forced the doors open. Steve crouched on the stairs, shield in front of him, Barnes at his shoulder, rifle pointed straight at him.

Tony held up his hands and ordered the faceplate to open. “You seem a little defensive.” He kept his voice low, tone conciliatory.

“It's been a long day,” Steve said, walking towards Tony, shield still at the ready. Barnes kept that rifle pointed at him, not a shake in sight.

Tony glanced up at Barnes. “At ease, Soldier. I'm not currently after you.” Barnes didn’t budge.

“Then why are you here?” Steve asked. He looked weary. Sad. Resigned. 

Tony met his gaze. “Could be your story is not so crazy. Maybe,” he hedged. “Ross has no idea I'm here. I'd like to keep it that way. Otherwise, I’ve got to arrest myself.” He tried a little grin, but it felt wrong on his face. Smiling had no place in this fortress of horror.

“Well, that sounds like a lot of paperwork,” Steve said, his sly humor creeping in. Fucking finally, he lowered his shield. “It's good to see you, Tony.”

With an almost giddy sense of relief Tony said, “You too, Cap.” He looked back up to Barnes again. “Hey, Manchurian Candidate, you're killing me. There's a truce here. You can drop…” He saw Steve sign to Barnes without a word and he lowered his gun. Tony ignored the slightly sick panic roiling in his belly. 

Still saying nothing, they walked through what Tony was privately calling the abattoir. Surprisingly, at one point, Barnes took his place at Tony’s shoulder and Steve took the rear.

They walked towards a huge chamber filled with pods. Tony swallowed the bile rising in his throat. “Anyone alive in here, FRIDAY?” he asked.

“Not in the capsules, boss,” FRIDAY sounded a little shaken. “But I am picking up one heartbeat.”

“I got heat signatures,” Tony told Steve.

“How many?” Steve asked.

“Uh, one,” Tony said. The lights came on suddenly and they turned in circles, looking at the slaughter in front of them. Tony didn’t miss the miniscule flinch as Barnes walked past a couple of the pods where bodies lay with bullet holes punched through the glass into their foreheads.

“If it's any comfort, they died in their sleep.” Tony recognized the voice. Zemo. “Did you really think I wanted more of you?” Bucky was staring at one corpse in particular. 

“What the hell?” Barnes’ voice was a gravelly rasp of pain. Tony felt sympathy surge through him. Having spent some time combing through the Winter Soldier archives, thanks to Fury and Natasha’s revenge on HYDRA, he had some idea of what these poor bastards had been put through.

Zemo started a typical villain shtick, telling them all about why he had brought them here and drooled a little over Steve’s eyes. And then he said, “An empire toppled by its enemies can rise again. But one which crumples from within? That's dead… forever.”

A screen lit up and Tony knew what it was before even a second had gone by. He’d seen this before. He knew what it was. He knew that Steve knew. And hadn’t ever told him. 

Liar.

He stood there, watching as the Winter Soldier murdered his parents and then shot out the surveillance camera with no expression on his face.

“Tony.” Steve sounded anxious. 

Tony turned his gaze to him. Last chance. “Did you know?”

Steve’s eyes were wide with panic. “I didn't know it was him.”

Liar.

Tony felt everything turn to ice inside him. “Don't bullshit me, Rogers! Did you know?”

And finally, here, in the middle of nowhere Siberia, Steve dropped his chin and whispered, “Yes.”

Tony looked over at Barnes. “Do you even remember them?” He was curious. What HYDRA had done to Barnes was monstrous, evil in a way that even Obie hadn’t ever managed to achieve.

Barnes met his gaze squarely. Tony admired that courage. He sort of understood why Steve loved Barnes so much. “I remember all of them.”

Steve stepped between them. “He's my friend.” That chin jutted up again as he made his choice.

Tony wasn’t sure, right until that moment, what the sound was that a heart made as it broke. “So was I.”

“Tony…” Steve held out a hand. Tony twitched away. He didn’t allow the sorrow crossing Steve’s face to touch him. 

“I’m going back home,” he told Steve. “Ross is about to be arrested for crimes against humanity for his role in what happened to Banner and others. King T’Challa has agreed to help re-write the Accords to make it more reasonable for all parties. Signing them bought us the time to change them. But if you’d asked me back at the compound, then I could have told you what the plan was.”

“I’m sorry,” Steve stepped towards him. Tony stepped away. Steve’s eyes were a little damp. Tony felt nothing.

“I knew about your buddy being the one who killed my parents,” he said. “Found out before you and Fury took SHIELD down.”

Steve went pale. “I was…”

Tony shook his head sharply. “You’ve had years to tell me, Cap.” He looked over at Barnes. “If you want some help getting rid of the crazy in your brain, I have something that could help,” he said.

“Why?” Barnes asked.

“Because it wasn’t your fault,” Tony said. “I know when to blame someone for something, Barnes. You were a mindless weapon for seventy plus years with no control. I can relate to being used without my permission.”

“I’m a wanted man,” Barnes reminded him.

Tony waved a hand. “Semantics. I can prove most of it. The chair is a big piece of the evidence.” He saw Barnes recoil at the mention of the chair. “Don’t worry. It’ll be melted down as soon as I’ve got you a pardon.”

“Tony, that’s amazing,” Steve whispered. “Thank you.”

When Tony looked at Steve, he saw a stranger. “I’m not doing this for you,” he said. “I won’t be doing anything for you again.” He passed Barnes a phone. “My number is on there. Call me when you’re ready.”

He left Steve and Barnes there in Siberia. Barnes would call. Tony would help him. Steve was dead to him in every way.

Liar.


	5. everyone runs the risk of being swallowed up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve and Tony are still at detente. But someone familiar arrives to shake things up and maybe make them all realise that they're not as broken as they think they are.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So we're at Infinity War - some of the dialogue has been attributed to different characters because reasons.
> 
> Next chapter will be a big time jump - be warned. I hope you're enjoying my alternate take because really boys, the team should always be together.

**everyone runs the risk of being swallowed up**

Steve waited for Bucky. Tony wouldn’t allow him to enter the compound. He sat beneath one of the huge trees surrounding the buildings and doodled awhile.

This had become a routine thing. Once a week, Steve would bring Bucky to see Tony and let him mess around in his best friend’s brain. Sometimes it worked, other times Bucky sank into a silence that he couldn’t penetrate.

The others would come out and spend time with Steve occasionally. Natasha, Sam and Peter were his regular companions. Wanda and Vision seemed uncomfortable with him around so never stayed long. He never saw Tony.

“What are you drawing today?” Sam dropped down beside him.

“Buck asked me to draw one of my first memories of him,” Steve said, offering Sam the notebook. It was a simple sketch of two boys back to back surrounded by a circle of other boys. All of their fists were up.

“You just never stop, do you?” Sam chuckled, running a thumb over the skinny boy almost half the size of the other one. “No wonder they chose you to get the serum.”

Steve’s mouth twisted. “I’m starting to think they made a mistake.”

“They chose the best person possible,” Sam insisted. “Imagine if they’d picked someone like Stark.”

The flash of hot anger surprised him. “Don’t talk about Tony like that,” he barked. “He’s the best of all of us.”

Sam blinked. “He’s a rich man who has had everything handed to him on a silver platter all his life.”

Steve shook his head. “You’re so smart and help so many people. How the fuck do you not see who the real Tony Stark is?” He met Sam’s gaze. “He’s Earth’s best defender. He’s laid on the wire more times than you know.”

“He’s banned you from the compound, from the Avengers,” Sam reminded him.

“And I sorta deserve it,” Steve said. “I promised Tony that we’d always do things together. That the only way the Avengers would work, would be together. And then I lied to him and left him to deal with the clean-up.”

“Barnes,” Sam said, face somber. 

“Bucky,” Steve agreed. “The moment he showed up, I forgot everything I’d experienced in this time. It was like I’d got some of my old life back and I didn’t need the people I’d met and bonded with in this one.”

“I was there for a lot of that, Cap. You didn’t forget anyone,” Sam assured him.

Steve’s smile was wry. “You’re a good friend, Sam.” 

Sam handed the notebook back. “Tony asked me to spend some time with Barnes.” The words were casual, but his eyes were anything but.

“Why?” Steve began to ask. “Oh, like a therapist.” He nodded. “That’s a really great idea.”

“You think?” Sam didn’t sound sure.

“Buck needs someone he can trust.” Steve sighed, putting his book and pencils down. “I’m too invested, and keep wanting him to be the Bucky I grew up with. The guy that I got back is not that Bucky anymore. It’s taken far too long for me to realize that.”

“He’s still your friend,” Sam reminded him. 

Steve nudged his shoulder. “So are you, Tasha, Bruce, even Clint.” He smiled ruefully. “I forgot that when I stopped listening to Tony.”

“He makes it hard sometimes,” Sam agreed. “He’s so fucking cocky.”

Steve laughed then. “It used to make me crazy,” he said. “Until one day I realized that it was all part of the Tony Stark Smokescreen.” Sam raised an eyebrow. “The public Tony is very different to the real deal. He wears his suits and sunglasses like Iron Man wears the armor.”

Sam thought for a moment. “I kinda get what you’re saying. The dude who comes into the kitchen at six am in grease and ratty clothes, begging for coffee, isn’t quite who I was expecting.”

“That’s the real Tony.” Steve smiled, suddenly exhausted. “Damn. I fucked up. I miss my friend.”

“I’ll work on that for you if you’d like?” Sam offered.

“Nah,” Steve said. “I’ll figure it out.”

Just then a large circle of what seemed like fire split open and spat out two figures. Steve and Sam jumped to their feet. One of them was remarkably familiar.

“Bruce?” Steve asked.

“Uh,” Bruce looked at his companion. “This isn’t quite where we’re supposed to be.”

The other, a tall man with a thin, bearded face, intense eyes and a cloak that would rival Thor’s, said to Steve, “Tony Stark, I'm Doctor Stephen Strange. I need you to come with me.”

“That’s not Tony!” Bruce said, almost hysterically. “That’s Steve.” He gave a little wave. “Hey Cap.”

Steve blinked. “Hey, Bruce.”

Several things happened all at once. Tony and Rhodes thumped down in their armor, repulsors and weapons at the ready, Vision and Wanda hovering above them, clearly prepared for whatever was happening. Bucky and Natasha sprinted out of the compound after them.

“Hey, Tony.” Bruce gave the same awkward little wave. “How’re you doing?”

“Bruce?” The nanite armor that Steve had yet to inspect up close, slipped away and Tony frowned at him. “You okay?”

Steve, and everyone else, was astonished when Bruce just lunged at Tony, clinging to him. Tony patted him on the back, eyes wildly meeting Rhodes’.

The stranger with the beard and the cloak, Strange, turned to Tony and repeated, “Tony Stark, I'm Doctor Stephen Strange. I need you to come with me.”

Steve almost giggled. It was a terrible, hysterical impulse, but seriously, what the fuck was his life?

“I’m sorry, but why would I do that?” Tony asked, Bruce still limpeting against him.

“We need your help.” He paused, clearly for dramatic effect. Considering who surrounded him, it didn’t really work. “Look, it's not overselling to say that the fate of the universe is at stake.” Now the guy seemed impatient and Steve felt every muscle in his body go tense. 

The glowing circle of fiery light didn’t move. Steve scooted a little over and peered through at a room on the other side of the circle. It looked like a library. An old one.

“He’s not going alone.” Tasha’s eyes were narrowed on Strange. “We’re a team.”

“We are?” Tony’s drawl was almost cruel. “Funny how I missed that memo.”

Bruce stared between them. “What’s going on?” he asked.

Tony sighed. “God, we haven't caught up in a spell, have we?”

“No,” Bruce agreed, slightly apologetic.

“The Avengers broke up. We’re toast,” Tony said, not looking at Steve.

“Broke up?” Bruce looked even more bewildered. “Like a band? Like The Beatles?” Sam’s snicker was not helpful.

“Cap and I fell out hard. We're not on speaking terms.” Tony still kept his gaze on Bruce. He could literally feel Steve’s eyes burning through his brain.

Bruce flailed at Steve. “But he’s standing right _here_!” 

“It’s complicated,” Tony admitted.

“This is fascinating,” Strange said, sounding anything but fascinated. “Whoever is coming with us, please step through the portal?” 

Bruce dragged at Tony’s arm. “We have to go. This is serious shit.” He looked at the rest of them. “It’s literally the end of everything we know.”

Tony sighed. “How can a boy refuse an invitation like that?” He stepped through the portal without looking back. Steve and Sam exchanged glances and hurried after him. The rest of the team, including Bucky, followed.

Huh, Steve thought. Maybe not so broken. Not just yet.

~~~~

Tony _really_ didn’t like Stephen Strange. Almost as much as he didn’t like Hank Pym. About as much as he disliked Reed Richards. 

His buddy, Wong, was another matter entirely. At least he was entertaining. Currently he had created a pretty cool looking magical universe whirling above their heads, as he intoned, “From the dawn of the universe, there was nothing. Then, boom! The Big Bang sent six elemental crystals, hurtling across the virgin universe. These Infinity Stones each control an essential aspect of existence.”

In the middle of the celestial show were six stones in various colors. Strange named them, “Space. Reality. Power. Soul. Mind.” They lit up as he called their names, slipping through stars. “And Time.” He looked down, wiggled his fingers in what Tony thought was a little bit extra for drama, and the big-ass chunk of metal hanging on his chest opened to reveal a gleaming emerald light.

Tony got a sick feeling in his stomach and he looked at Bruce. “Tell me his name again.”

Bruce surged towards him. “Thanos. He's a plague, Tony. He invades planets. He takes what he wants. He wipes out half the population. He sent Loki. The attack on New York. That's _him_.”

This was the moment, Tony thought. Since that cave in Afghanistan, he’d always known that there was a reason he’d made it out alive. This is it...” he murmured. He started pacing around the room. “What's our timeline?”

Bruce followed him. “No telling. He has the Power and Space Stones. That already makes him the strongest creature in the whole universe. If he gets his hands, on all six Stones, Tony...” Tony had seen Bruce nervous. He’d seen him afraid. He’d _never_ seen him terrified.

“He can destroy life on a scale hitherto undreamt of.” Strange added to Bruce’s frantic words.

Tony leaned against a large cauldron. His leg was cramping. He hadn’t had a chance to cool down after his workout with Rhodey. The cauldron provided a handy-dandy leaning post. “Did you  _seriously_  just say "hitherto undreamt of"?”

“Are you  _seriously_  leaning on the Cauldron of the Cosmos?” Strange whipped back.

Tony stared at the cauldron. “Is that what this is...?” Strange’s extremely strange and unsettlingly sentient cloak smacked Tony’s arm. He snatched it from the cauldron, glaring at the cloak. “I'm going to allow that.”

Natasha had remained silent through all of this. She asked Strange, “If Thanos needs all six, why don't we just stick this one down the garbage disposal?” She pointed at the Time Stone.

Strange shook his head. “No can do.”

Wong added, “We swore an oath to protect the Time Stone. With our lives.”

Tony shrugged. “Whatever. Things change.”

Strange glared at him. “Our oath to protect the Time Stone cannot change. This Stone may be the best chance we have against Thanos.”

The all-knowing wizard of weird shtick was getting old. Tony really, _really_ didn’t like Strange. 

Steve stepped between them. It was clearly brewing up to a fight. “And still conversely, it may also be his best chance against us,” he pointed out.

Strange stepped a little closer to Steve. Tony wasn’t too sure how he felt about that. “Well, if we don't do our jobs.” Tony watched Steve lift his jaw, set in the way that only Captain America, the world’s most stubborn asshole could do.

He peered around the width of Steve’s shoulders. “What is your job exactly, besides making balloon animals?”

“Protecting your reality, douchebag.” Yeah, Tony thought. The hatred was mutual. He still had it.

Rhodes, the eternal voice of reason broke into the testosterone-filled standoff. “Okay, guys, could we table this discussion right now? The fact is that we have this Stone. We know where it is.”

“And we have the Mind Stone,” Vision reminded them with a little poke to the yellow gem on his forehead. Tony had to grit his teeth at the sweater vest combo he was wearing because fucking Steve Rogers infected everything.

“So he has two and we have two,” Sam said. 

“And the others?” Tony asked Strange.

“Reality and Soul,” Wong said. “We aren’t sure where they are.”

Bruce grabbed Tony’s arm. “Tony, listen to me. Thor's gone. Thanos is coming.”

“Thor’s gone?” Steve asked.

“Thanos killed Loki along with what was left of Asgard,” Bruce said, his face twisted in misery. “Heimdall sent me back to Earth to warn you all. To tell you that we need to be ready to fight for survival.”

Natasha brushed at her hair. “Say, Doc, you wouldn't happen to be moving your hair, would you?”

Strange watched as his own hair fluttered in an invisible breeze. “Not at the moment, no.”

The sound of something huge crashing outside the Sanctum had them all rushing towards the door. There were people screaming and running and debris flying in the air.

Tony ducked as a car crashed into a pole nearby him. Steve muscled him out of the way. “Be careful,” he said. Tony didn’t miss that Sam and the Soldier were flanking Cap.

He ignored Steve and put his glasses on. “FRIDAY, what am I looking at?” A large circular spaceship spun over the street.

She sounded a little shaken. “Not sure, I'm working on it, boss.”

Rhodey looked back at Strange. “Hey! You might wanna put that Time Stone in your back pocket, Doc!”

Bands of spells slipped around Strange’s arms like miniature bracelets and he smiled a little grimly. “Might wanna use it.”

A skinny, ugly looking fucker stood in the middle of the destruction next to a monster with an axe the size of a small truck. Two more stood beside them, a woman who would give Natasha a run for her scary money and something else. Tony had no idea what or who they were.

Ugly Dude, who bore a more than passing resemblance to Squidward, spoke, “Hear me, and rejoice. You are about to die at the hands of the Children of Thanos. Be thankful, that your meaningless lives are now contributing to...”

Tony held up a hand. “I'm sorry, Earth is closed today. You better pack it up and get outta here.”

And what do you know, the team took their places behind him, Steve and Strange at his side.

Tony thought maybe, just maybe, they might make it out alive.

“Probability is small,” Strange muttered.

“Mind-reading is not cool,” Tony grumbled.

Squidward made a sighing sound. “He exhausts me.”

“Me too,” Steve agreed with a rueful grin. “But he’s right, and you’re trespassing in this city and on this planet.”

“Leave and nobody else has to get hurt,” Tony said with a surprised glance over at Steve.

“Bring me the Stone,” Squidward ordered.

And it was on.


	6. you will be alone always and then you will die

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loss is unacceptable.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy America Day my US friends!
> 
> This is therapeutic in a very strange way.
> 
> I hope you enjoy.

**you will be alone always and then you will die**

They lost.

Thor screamed, “No!” as Thanos snapped his fingers, Stormbreaker embedded deep within the Titan’s chest. “What did you do? **What did you _do_**?” 

Steve followed the scream, stumbling into the road where Thor stood, Bucky at his heels. Steve was bleeding profusely from his left side. “Thor... did he do it?” he asked.

“Steve?” Bucky’s confused question had Steve spinning to look at him as he collapsed, crumbling to dust.

“Bucky!” Steve fell to his knees, something breaking inside as he pushed his hands into ash. All around him, dust and ash flew into the air, a powdery rain of human cells torn apart as they stood.

He looked over to where Wanda crouched over Vision, her eyes lifting once more to meet his as she disintegrated.

“Sam?” Steve heard Rhodes yelling. “Sam? Where are you?” And he knew. He knew.

It was all Steve could do to stagger to his feet and race to where he’d last seen Tony and Strange. He fell at Tony’s side, pushing his hand against where the suit gaped open and raw. “Tony?”

Tony wasn’t looking at him though. His gaze was turned to where Strange sat oddly still. “There was no other way,” Strange told them and drifted into dust.

“Oh God,” Steve breathed.

“Mr. Stark?” The trembling voice of a terrified boy had Steve helping Tony over to where Peter stood. “I don’t feel so good.” Steve wanted to scream as he watched tiny particles of ash begin to slide off the kid’s body.

Tony looked just as terrified as Peter, shrugging Steve away. “You’re alright,” he told him.

Peter fell into Tony’s arms, and Steve caught them both as they stumbled back into him. “I don't know what's- I don't know what's happening. I don't…” Steve wasn’t sure who was crying harder, Peter or him. “Save me, save me! I don't wanna go, I don't wanna go, sir, please. Please, I don't wanna go. I don't wanna go... I'm sorry.” 

The wind took the last of him in a sudden gust. Steve fell down, Tony still in his arms, ash coating them like a funeral pyre.

Rhodes came towards them. “I can’t find Sam. What is this? What the hell is happening?” His face was grey and gaunt, aged ten years in ten seconds.

Tony turned in Steve’s arms, buried his head in Steve’s neck. “I couldn’t stop him.” Steve felt the suit groan beneath his clutching hands.

“Neither could I,” Steve whispered into his hair, his heart breaking at the thought of how awfully, completely, utterly they’d failed. Even though they’d stood together, it hadn’t been enough.

“I lost the kid,” Tony told him, as though Steve hadn’t been there, watching as yet another person that Tony loved was taken away from him.

“ _We_ lost,” Steve said, his arms tight around Tony. Whatever else had happened, this fight, this war, had brought them some sort of connection once more. They had fought, given it their all. Together.

Natasha and Bruce skidded around the corner. “You’re alive!” Bruce said, relief palpable in his voice.

“If you could call it that,” Tony said, finally pushing away from Steve. He allowed Steve to help him to his feet, bruised, battered, bleeding like the rest of them. “Where did Thanos go? Where is he now?”

“He just opened up a portal and walked through,” Rhodes said, pointing back to where Thor had been screaming.

Thor hadn’t moved. On his knees, head bowed, his tears were streams of flickering light. Tendrils of lighting ran up and down his body as he struggled to control his rage and sorrow.

“Who of ours have we lost?” Natasha asked, ever practical, put her hand on Thor’s shoulder. He shuddered at her touch.

“Bucky, Peter, Strange, Wanda and Vision,” Steve said. “Sam too, I think?” He looked at Rhodes who shrugged.

“I should call Clint,” Natasha said and Steve could see the panic flash across those normally calm eyes.

“Pepper,” Tony said urgently.

“And Fury,” Steve said.

But with half the world taken in an instant, a rapture of sorts, they couldn’t reach anyone. They were what was left. They were the last line of defense.

And they’d failed.

~~~~

Pepper was gone. Happy. Fury. Hill. T’Challa. Shuri. Lang. Pym. Clint’s family. Tony couldn’t even imagine what that had done to Barton. He’d been out. Free. And that purple fucking nightmare had taken them all away without a moment’s remorse.

Steve and Tony sat at the conference table back at the compound. It was twenty-three days later, and there was a hush over the world as everyone struggled to take in what had happened.

Tony could still feel the grip of Peter’s hands fading as he begged Tony to do something, to save him.

“How are you doing?” Steve asked. It felt like they could only talk in whispers. It was a question they all asked each other. Every day.

“I feel like crap and I’m fuck out of ideas.” The honesty this time surprised them both. Tony closed his eyes. “This is possibly the absolute worst timing for this conversation, but it needs to be said. I’m sorry.” 

Steve frowned. Lines that hadn’t ever marred that perfect face were now etched deep into his brow. Absolute sorrow could do that to a superhuman apparently. “What for?”

“The Accords,” Tony said. “I pushed too hard, too fast, didn’t look at the fine print. Didn’t give you all a chance to have your say before I went ahead with signing. I was stupid. Stubborn. Arrogant. I wanted to save everyone. I didn’t want anybody else to die because I hadn’t done my job.”

“A suit of armor around the world,” Steve murmured. “Would that really have made a difference after all?” His face was kind. It was a good face, Tony thought. A friend’s face.

Tony shook his head. “Doubtful. Thanos kicked our asses. We stood together, and he still won.”

“The Accords weren’t a bad idea, Tony,” Steve said. “It was the execution, the timing, Ross.”

“Yeah, Bruce was seriously pissed off with me about that.” Tony gave a humorless laugh. “Told me Hulk would have made me eat the entire document.”

That startled a laugh out of Steve. “I’d have paid to see that.”

Tony sighed again, running his fingers over a mark on the table that one of Clint’s kids had made on a visit there. “I should have talked to you first.”

Steve shrugged. “That has always been our biggest problem. Our first inclination was to fight, remember?”

Tony chuckled then. “God, we were idiots.” A choked sob escaped. “And for fucking what?”

“You giving up?” Steve asked. There was something in his voice. Something sharp.

Tony looked at him sharply. “It’s done, Cap. There’s no turning this back. This is the world remade, and we have to learn to live in it.”

Steve shrugged. “I don’t know, Tony. The guy in that flashy red and gold suit would have been looking for a fix already.”

Tony’s gaze narrowed. “Are you daring me to find a solution for this, Rogers?”

“Double-dog daring, Stark,” Steve grinned, a small, but beautiful thing. “I have faith in you.” Tony thought that despite the sorrow and the loss, at least they’d worked through their anger at each other and become a stronger unit for it.

Tony snorted. “I’ve missed you, Captain Sasspants.” And he had. Apart from Pepper and Happy, Steve had been the person Tony had spent the most time with once the Avengers had moved in together. 

“I missed you too, Tony. How about we make a deal?” Tony raised an eyebrow. It was a very deliberately ‘Tony’ thing to do and his reward was when Steve’s smile widened. “No more lies. You piss me off, I call you on it. I piss you off….”

“Sounds hopeful,” Tony mused. “I guess it’s the end of all things right now as Armageddon has already happened. It’s not like lightning will strike us if we don’t stick to our promises.” He held out a hand. “I need you to haul me back if I go too far,” he said, voice serious. “My brain sometimes works faster than my mouth and I say things I don’t mean.”

“Then I need you to tell me to pull the stick out of my ass if I’m being too unbending,” Steve countered, grabbing his hand hard. “This world isn’t black and white. I need you to help me see the shades of grey.”

Tony’s eyes gleamed. “No.” Steve put up a hand. “I am not reading or watching those things.” Tony made sure Steve could see the pout. They grinned at each other.

Thor strode in. “I must return to my brothers in New Asgard,” he declared. “As their king I must help them grow more comfortable with mortal things.”

“You’re not going to stay for the plan?” Steve asked.

“What plan?” Bruce and Rhodey wandered in, Natasha at their heels. She looked exhausted. They all were.

“Tony’s got a plan,” Steve said.

Tony glared hard enough at Steve to set his nose hair on fire.

“You do?” Thor asked, the hope in his voice almost too much to bear.

“I have perhaps the beginning of the possibility of a prospect of a potential plan,” Tony said, still trying to burn Steve with his brain.

Steve did that big dumb blond aw shucks shtick that nobody believed any more. The fucker winked at Tony!

“That sounds….bleak,” Natasha said.

“I’m working on it,” Tony assured them, the tiny spark of hope in their eyes more than he could deal with right now. “I need you and Thor to corral Barton and bring him home.” He met Natasha’s gaze. “He’s out of control.”

“On it, boss,” Natasha said with the shadow of her usual smirk. Tony would take it. “I expect plan updates when we get back.” Technically, he, Tony Stark, was in charge of the Avengers Initiative. God help them all.

Tony saluted her. She’d keep Thor busy and round up the idiot who was trying to kill the other half of earth’s population.

“So,” Bruce folded his arms. “About that plan?” Tony could see the skepticism in his eyes.

“What have I ever done to cause you to doubt me so, Dr. Banner?” He made an effort to sound genuinely hurt.

Rhodey coughed into his fist. Tony thought he heard a “bullshit” somewhere in there.

“I know where Thanos is.” They all looked up to see two women walk in. One was a leggy blonde in a skin-tight outfit that Tony admired chastely. The other, the one who’d spoken, looked like a blue and silver Frankenstein’s monster of bits and pieces of metal patch-worked together to form something vaguely human.

They all jumped to their feet, Steve subtly shielding Tony with his body. “Who the hell are you?” Tony asked.

“My name is Nebula and Thanos murdered my sister. I am bound to avenge her death.” There was something in those eyes that reminded Tony a little of Vision. 

“How do you know him?” Steve hadn’t moved.

“He is…was, my father,” Nebula said.

Before anyone could react to this, the other woman stepped in front of her. “My name is Carol Danvers. I’m from Earth and I think you should listen to her.”

Thor walked over to Carol. He held his hand up, and caught Stormbreaker as it flew over to him, missing Carol by inches. 

She didn’t even flinch, instead smiled a little at him. “I like this one.” Thor declared.

“So, Blue Meanie, where is your purple parent?” Tony asked.

“Thanos spent a long time trying to perfect me,” Nebula replied. “Then as he worked, he talked about his great plan. Even disassembled, I wanted to please him. I'd ask "where would we go once his plan was complete"? His answer was always the same: To the Garden.”

“Eden?” Steve frowned. 

“When Thanos snapped his fingers, Earth became ground zero for a power surge of ridiculously cosmic proportions. No one's ever seen anything like it.” Bruce said. “Until two days ago. On this planet.” He called up a hologram of a planet, a shockwave visibly traversing the surface.

“Thanos is there,” Nebula agreed.

Natasha stared at the hologram. “He used the stones again.”

The woman in spandex, Carol, Tony reminded himself, said, “So let's get him. We can use the stones to bring everyone back.”

“Just like that?” Rhodey asked. Tony was going to have a lot of fun ribbing him about his visible crush on Supergirl.

Steve nodded. “Yeah, just like that.” Tony saw Steve and Carol share a knowing look. Superpowers sometimes made people extremely annoying.

“Even if there's a small chance that we can undo this,” Natasha’s voice hitched. “I mean we owe it to everyone who's not in this room to try.”

Bruce looked around at them. “If we do this, how do we know it's gonna end any differently than it did before?”

“Because before, you didn't have me.” Carol sounded just like Tony. Thor was right. He liked her too.

Rhodey gave her a glare. “Hey, new girl, everyone here is about that superhero life. And if you don't mind my asking, where the hell have you been all this time?" Totally crushing on her, Tony cackled internally.

She just looked at him. “There are a lot of other planets in the universe. And unfortunately, they didn't have you guys.” Amend that, Tony thought. He fucking _loved _her.__

__Steve squared his shoulders and Tony knew what was coming next “Let's go get this son of a bitch.”_ _

__The plan?_ _

__Attack._ _


End file.
